It is clear that pain is inevitable in life, whether it be physical or mental pain. It is our reaction to pain that is the source of much suffering. For example, it is common for people to habitually react by blaming others or placing undo blame on themselves in unhelpful ways.
An honest look within may reveal habitual ways you are reacting automatically to pain, and that reaction may be causing you suffering. These reactions may have been used effectively when you were younger to simply survive a traumatic experience or environment. However, it is no longer the case that you are that young child, and it is no longer necessary to react in the ways you did as a child with reactions such as being invisible and unnoticed, expecting to be abandoned by every meaningful relationship you encounter, or refusing to be vulnerable with anyone for fear of being hurt.